Huma Abedin hadnxe2x80x99t been working in the White House long when the Monica Lewinsky scandal broke. Although she would eventually become like a second daughter to Hillary and Bill Clinton xe2x80x93 most visibly as the formerxe2x80x99s right-hand woman during the 2016 presidential election campaign xe2x80x93 she was then just a distant junior aide to the first lady. Perhaps that explains why, as she writes in her new memoir, she initially assumed the rumours couldnxe2x80x99t possibly be true. Everyone in politics was young and starry-eyed once.

Unusually, however, Abedin seems to have stayed that way. Even when the president actually confesses to the affair she was sure hadnxe2x80x99t happened, she resolves sternly to xe2x80x9cput my judgments and emotions asidexe2x80x9d and focus on the bigger picture. Hadnxe2x80x99t she been taught as a child that xe2x80x9cslander, gossip and exploiting peoplexe2x80x99s personal weaknesses are among the worst forms of conduct for any Muslimxe2x80x9d?

Itxe2x80x99s at this point xe2x80x93 well before the story of the older senator who lunged when she went back to his place for what she genuinely assumed was coffee, or the husband who betrayed her xe2x80x93 that some readers may wonder whether the author is almost too pure for her chosen world. But then, in her telling, so is half the White House. Bill Clinton comes across as thoroughly avuncular. The first ladyxe2x80x99s office is a sisterly utopia where the boss instantly apologises for getting even mildly tetchy under pressure. xe2x80x9cHillaryland is xe2x80x98how is your mom feeling?xe2x80x99 and xe2x80x98you should talk to my allergistxe2x80x99,xe2x80x9d Abedin writes. xe2x80x9cHillaryland is xe2x80x98Happy birthday!xe2x80x99 and xe2x80x98amazing job!xe2x80x99 and xe2x80x98get some restxe2x80x99! Hillaryland is all of those things because Hillary Clinton is all of those things.xe2x80x9d Working up close with politicians means getting to know them warts and all, and most aides have their moments of doubt or despair. But either Clinton is uniquely inspirational or Abedin uniquely generous. Itxe2x80x99s the dynamic between the two women that makes this book compelling.

It opens with a fascinating exploration of a childhood spent between two worlds. Abedin is the daughter of two professors: an Indian-born father, and a mother whose family moved from India to Pakistan after partition. They emigrated to the US separately on academic scholarships before meeting and starting their family in Michigan. When Abedin was a toddler, the family took what was meant to be a sabbatical in Saudi Arabia, and ended up staying.

She had to get used to covering up, and watching her mother relinquish the right to drive. Yet in the book, Abedin argues that growing up overseas in a culture supportive of her familyxe2x80x99s Muslim faith built her confidence: xe2x80x9cIxe2x80x99d never had to be the brown kid in an American school who was teased for bringing xe2x80x98weirdxe2x80x99 ethnic food in my lunchbox xe2x80xa6 I was never xe2x80x98the otherxe2x80x99 and I found I could fit in everywhere.xe2x80x9d Returning to New York for university, she slips comfortably enough back into American life, though she steers warily clear of dating. Itxe2x80x99s this ability to move between cultures xe2x80x93 the most obvious both/and of the title xe2x80x93 which makes her stand out, first as an intern at the White House, and later in her first big job organising foreign travel for the globe-trotting first lady. What also sticks in the mind, however, is her promise at the job interview to do xe2x80x9cwhatever it takesxe2x80x9d to help the woman she idolised succeed.

The next section of the book is the only one that drags a little. More glorified bag-carrier at this stage than strategist, Abedin offers little deep insight into the Clinton presidency or Hillary Clintonxe2x80x99s subsequent career as a New York senator, despite some intriguing glimpses behind the scenes. (At one point she overhears Clinton calling home, telling the now ex-president where to find cleaning materials under the sink.) The story crackles back to life, however, when Anthony Weiner enters it.

He is a confident, and suspiciously smooth, young congressman a decade her senior; she is a virgin with a tendency to see the best in everyone. Reading about their courtship is like watching a horror film and screaming at the heroine not to go into the haunted house, while knowing that, of course, she will.

When Abedin finds a flirty email from a stranger on Weinerxe2x80x99s phone not long before their wedding, she accepts his explanation readily enough. Even when her husband is caught sexting other women, having accidentally posted an indecent photo on social media, a newly pregnant Abedin initially believes that his account must have been hacked. Besides, having lost her own father young, she desperately wants their baby to grow up with a daddy. Thus begins a painful spiral recognisable to anyone ever sucked into a toxic relationship.

Abedin is often asked whether, in standing repeatedly by her sexually transgressive man, she was simply copying Clinton. Yet the book suggests that is too reductive an explanation. Weiner was her first ever lover, and she believed he could change. By the time she realised he wouldnxe2x80x99t, she had a toddler to consider and a job reliant on a spouse taking care of everything at home. (After his political career ended in scandal, Weiner became a house-husband.) The final chapters see her worlds colliding messily as she attempts to reconcile being both vice-chair of Clintonxe2x80x99s 2016 presidential campaign and a wife embroiled in a scandal.

Despite pressure to fire Abedin and protect her own career from the fallout, Clinton resisted. She stood by her closest aide even when Weiner did it again, this time in such grim circumstances xe2x80x93 sending indecent photographs of himself with their sleeping son in shot xe2x80x93 that Abedin finally filed for divorce. Both Clintons emerge from this episode as unfailingly kind, particularly to Abedinxe2x80x99s son, and true to the feminist principle that a woman shouldnxe2x80x99t pay for her husbandxe2x80x99s crimes. (A year after the election, Weiner was jailed for sending explicit pictures to an underage girl.) But this story raises the haunting, hard-nosed question of just how wise that was.

True to form, Abedin apparently didnxe2x80x99t see her bossxe2x80x99s defeat coming. She understood some voters didnxe2x80x99t warm to Clinton; she knew how damaging an eve-of-election FBI investigation into her bossxe2x80x99s use of a private email server was, having been dragged into it after her own emails were discovered on Weinerxe2x80x99s laptop for reasons she cannot explain. Yet she still couldnxe2x80x99t quite believe Donald Trump would beat a better-qualified woman. Does that make her naive, or merely human? Perhaps for Huma Abedin, itxe2x80x99s always a case of both/and.